My President Trump Wish List

Donald Trump has been elected the 45th president of the United States. Here’s my wish list for his four-year reign of terror.

  1. The trial of Lena Dunham
  2. The revocation of my healthcare
  3. Everything covered in gold
  4. Daddy/Sub relationship between Putin and Trump
  5. Being drafted into the Second Mexican American War
  6. President “Mr. Brexit”
  7. All my friends in camps
  8. Supreme Court made up solely of Giuliani, Peter Thiel, and Stephen Baldwin
  9. Legalization of incest; Trump & Ivanka’s wedding
  10. The coronation of The Exalted Prince Barron Trump
  11. A three-day weekend culminating with Blue Lives Matter Day
  12. The reinstitution of prima noctae
  13. Chris Christie, Jester of the High Court of Trump
  14. Oliver Stone’s DONALD
  15. Riding Rosie O’Donnell’s underground railroad to Quebec
  16. Secretary of State “Chachi From Happy Days”
  17. Installation of a Moon Door in The White House
  18. The millennial genocide
  19. The shuttering of The New York Times
  20. The public execution of Lena Dunham